What do you feel?
You are shaking..
You would be too, brother of mine.
You need to tell me what happened.
So I can help you.
She smiled and said:
Not everything has a context,
Not everything can be fixed,
Sometimes you just need darkness,
Instead of rationality.
But being there for you can’t hurt, can it? I caught myself wondering.
Why do we worry so much? Why is there a constant voice at the back of our heads screaming that all good things will eventually come to an end? We have a knack for thinking the worst and I don’t blame us. Life usually gives us a reason to think so.
I recently caught myself going over these lines from Man’s Search for Meaning written by Viktor Frankl, “What did the prisoner dream about most frequently? Of bread, cake, cigarettes, and nice warm baths.” These are all things you and I take for granted.
Nice warm baths.
I think I might just appreciate them more now.
I was thinking of all the little things I enjoy the most and I came up with these 3 things:
- The fresh scent of coffee brewing early in the morning, even though I’m not much of a coffee drinker myself.
- Feeling the cooler side of the pillow when you turn it over.
- People smiling.
We really need to get lost in the now more, no?
I have a friend who has this thing for going all in. Yesterday they were ridiculed for being too obvious while talking to someone. Needless to say the people’s laughter was met by my friend’s embarrassment. It was all too familiar, time and time again I’ve seen people being jeered at for not hiding their feelings well enough.
I do think there is a fine line between enthusiasty and plain desperation. Is being apparent (subconsciously or otherwise) really such a bad thing? Regardless of the end result, isn’t taking a chance going through hell in itself?
“Are you happy in your own shoes?”, my friend asked me later that day. I didn’t know what to reply so I just stared. They smiled and said, “I am.”
I think trying too hard isn’t too bad. And apples are just lovely. No?
Recently I reached the 3 month level mark at my new job. Back up a few months and I could tell you I was a nervous wreck at my first day at work. I didn’t know what to expect honestly, but by the end of it I was left with the feeling of assurance. I can’t thank some of the people at work enough.
Now I have been through many transitions in my life and the one thing I always dread is the not knowing. Its especially true when you are facing them alone. The not knowing of what excellence or unpleasantness awaits you is just terrifying. But its also exciting. It can be anything; from your first day at college to meeting a new person altogether. What I have realized though, is that change isn’t always bad and that taking a plunge can really pay off every so often.
Caution change, do not deplore it,
If you are in a situation, embrace it,
Be like Sam, say pish posh
and let you carry you away
I am in a good place right now and I should start appreciating my people more. Here is to hoping 2017 is more of them and a little less of me.
Yesterday was Sunday. I missed you. So here is a rundown of things from today and yesterday:
People don’t really like their 25th birthdays for some odd reason.
Potterheads are some of the most passionate people I have seen.
Dunkin’ Donuts French Vanilla Iced Coffee is a hidden gem (shh.. you’re welcome)
I frankly donut (geddit ^) have the strength or time to get into a new show anymore.
I should really start reading again.
I learned that when dogs are happy, they wag their tails to the right.
Also, I should REALLY memorize my mom’s cell number.
Did you know that my neighbours have an excellent taste in everything?! So maybe, next time you could just.. nvm
I can’t wait for you to be back tomorrow (hopefully with some parcels for me). I do realise I have been nothing but selfish in this post, so how about an icy lemonade tomorrow afternoon?
You guys can come along too. Shh..
The weather is fairly pleasant right now. Clear skies, a light breeze, and an Irish tune to listen to. Hurroo Hurroo
Odds on me wasting the remainder of the day?
But who knows, I might just end up doing something productive. Till then, I’ll look for some youtube videos to cheer me up from this depressing song. Hurroo Hurroo!
*Searches for more gloomy songs* Yeah, just two more… I promise
I ended up taking philosophy this semester, and for some odd reason, I find myself constantly, wondering and picturing the lives of those around me. The odd part being that I feel as if I have some sort of an emotional attachment to them. Like I am part of their lives or rather, that they are part of mine. Not just people, though, it’s all these places that have been marked by countless memories; both joyful and tragic ones.
Some weeks back, I was sitting in my car (unsurprisingly), just waiting in the parking lot. Two parking spaces right to me was a young woman who had her head bent down on the steering wheel, it took me two full minutes to realise that she was crying her heart out, right there. Across from us, were these fleet of police cars and ambulances, and right in the middle, was a heavy bike which had clearly been involved in a horrible accident. Every now and then, she would pause to glance at the scene. It broke my heart to see her this way, and I wanted nothing more than to go and tell her, that everything was going to be okay, and that he was going to make it.
The rest of that day was a blur.
I love when people unite together for whatever good cause they might end up doing. I love when a person finds good from a huge pool of malice and spite. I love when a person guides another person, instead of judging and forcing his/her thoughts on them. Weird world this.
We want to lie on the grass unburnt;
Just breathe our way through life;
Underneath this glorious blanket of stars;
So we can stand tall, even after midnight.
We are constantly trying to improve ourselves in the hope that someday, we will be good enough for ourselves and for everyone else too. Sometimes, it does work out nicely.